Loyal Balloon.

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this is my final poem, meant to be read after The Girl in Pink and Blue. its based on my sister-like friendship with my very best friend Hailey (not telling last name) if that helps you not be confused.

Sometimes the balloon hangs in the air

Neither rising or falling

But still filled with despair

Sometimes the balloon reaches for the sky

But sometimes

That balloon just wants to die

“Stay on the path”

Spoke the balloons pink and blue girl

She filled him with hope

And he did a little twirl

Soon he reached for the sky 

but she brought him back down and said

“Not now my friend, i don’t want to be alone when i cry.”

He was filled with helium

And science told him to rise

 But the loyal balloon said “no! I will stay while she cries.”

And the balloon sunk to the floor. 

And rested his string on her shoulder

And he spoke to science and said “i will continue to hold her.

I am a loyal balloon

And maybe i shouldn’t belong,

But if you tell me to leave her

I’ll say ‘go suck a dong!’

Because i am a loyal balloon

And this is where I belong.”

The Pyfuhn Ray part 2

WHAT!?” Sethari’s voice boomed. His servant stammered with fear.

“A-a new world wonder they say.” he gulped. “A weapon. They’re calling it the Pyfun Ray.”
Sethari slammed his fists on the table.

“NO! I will not have it! Nobody outshines the Ahten!” he said, seething with jealousy. It seemed that his every pore was oozing unfiltered hatred.

The servant shook like a leaf in the wind, truly afraid of his master. He had never seen him so outraged, and considering the horrors Sethari performed when only slightly disgruntled….

He decided not to dwell on that.

“W-what do you intend to do about it milord?”

Sethari paused for a moment. Then a sort of ravenous insanity grew in his eyes. Lust. hunger for power. Whatever one might call it, the servant knew it would be his undoing. he watched that horrific request emerge from his lips, the words that would haunt him for the rest of his short lived life.
“Fetch me my crown.”

The servants eyes widened, even in his wildest nightmares he wouldn’t dare tempt the thought of his lord having such a mad request.
‘Th-the crown? THEE crown? But your father- it was his dying words that nobody ever have that kind of power-”

“Did i not make myself clear?” Sethari said edging towards the man, his sword held so tight in his hands that his knuckles were white.

“I- no! Perfectly clear. I just think-”
Sethari suddenly stabbed his blade down into the servant’s foot.

“You don’t think! You do! You know where it’s buried…”

He winced  “p-please…..i can’t…”

Sethari twisted the blade, doubling the damage done to his foot then spoke calmly yet forcefully, emphasizing every word.
“Fetch me, my crown….”

“Right away!” he peeped, relenting to the pain. “I’ll fetch it immediately!” the servant pleaded as his eyes moistened. A cry of pain formed in his throat as his foot throbbed in agony. But he held his tongue. If he didn’t, he might lose it.

“Right answer.” Sethari said, removing the sword and shoving him, only relenting enough as not to topple the man.

“Run!!! Fetch me my crown before I stab the other!” 

To his great agony, the servant ran off. A trail of scarlet red footprints left in his wake.

Sethari scanned the rest of the room, his gaze causing even his most lethal guards to tremble.

“Is anyone else among you completely incompetent?”
They all quickly shook their heads.

He huffed in satisfaction.
“good.”

The life of a storyteller

We live in a word of story,

A world of fantasy a world of adventure just around our peripheral.

But i cant shake this vision, this take on the world that is my own.

Everything has meaning. It is all adventure, it touches my ears and my sight and sits on my mind like a single drop of rain landing on your tongue.

The life of a story teller.

I try and try and i shout and i exclaim and i laugh and i cry

Because i want you to hear it.

And i want you to see

The things that i see.

The life of a story teller.

But nobody cares, if its not good no one shares,

Nobody shares what i see. Nobody cares about me.

The life of a storyteller.

I want you to feel it. And perhaps if i cant,

Then you can give your own to someone else.

Maybe even lift their spirits.

Like i’ve tried for you.

This is the life of a story teller, the life of myself. Ive tried to give you hope like that you deserve. So be hopefull, and tell us a story thats yours.

The pyfuhn Ray (part one)

King Bentuzi gazed out at his creation from the balcony.

It was magnificent, and he could not in good conscience take all the credit for it’s construction.

He turned to his servant and head engineer, Ashtheer Arkathyme, Bentuzi’s face lit with a grin that beamed like a childs.

“This is a great service you have done for this kingdom, Ashtheer, more than you will ever know.”

Ashtheer smiled humbly and gave a slight nod. A nod that acknowledged his own success, but not to the extent of outshining his king.

Ashtheer was a no nonsense man. He was an educated engineer. He was the inventor of the Arkathyme sphere and the designer of the nations most effective warships. And now he had created the greatest weapon of peace to grace Pyfuhneras lands.

He hoped.

“I am so glad you are pleased, lord Bentuzi.” he said genuinely.

“You have outdone yourself my friend. With this construct, we may finally free our people from those wretched beasts…” King Bentuzi said with visible distaste at their mention. “Perhaps even prevent war with The Ahten.”

Ashtheer nodded, but he doubted it would do more than enrage The Ahtens current ruler. Sethari was a jealous man, he knew that without doubt…

Nonetheless he knew how important this weapon was. It would effectively remove one of the oppressors Pyfuhnera faced. He understood that King Bentuzi had made a risky gamble.

We would face the beasts, or face war with the Ahten.

He hoped King Bentuzi had chosen right.

There was hope however, a weapon of this magnitude may finally strike some humility into the Ahtenians. He huffed to himself.

As if…

But Bentuzi chose to rejoice. A king deserved a moment of peace after all.

“Where is Lolana?” The king asked, excited to see the look on his wife’s face when she could see their creation finally completed.

“She is at the pyramid admiring it as we speak” Ashtheer said with a knowing smile. The king nodded, resting his elbows on the balconies railing as he gazed at the construct.

“What shall we call it?” He said with a sort of finalty, like a journey that had finally been completed.

“I was never one for creative literature, milord.”

Kind Bentuzi chuckled.
“Very well, but Ashtheer, you must know, a name is important. This thing we have built is more than a weapon. It is a symbol. It must unite our people. A ray of hope in the dark…”

He smiled. “The Pyfuhn Ray.”

(Also yes, i drew the featured image myself on google slides with about 400 different colored shapes. Also yes, it is essentially a giant magnifying glass on a pyramid to scorch their enemies buns off by magnifying the sun. And yes, part two is coming very soon.)

Cage cabell part 6

I woke up to the old fashioned crackling of a fireplace. It was probably still about 2 in the morning. The sun was still asleep beneath the mountains. I tried to get back to sleep when I heard:

“-I’m not sure…I’m not sure he has it in him.”

“No…no he’s the strongest cabell i’ve seen in years!”

“Strong? Why- he… he’s a toothpick! He could probably lift 2 twinkies. Max!”

I heard light chuckling.

“You know what i mean lena.” a voice i assumed was Ryan said tenderly.

“I swear if they kiss ima throw a Twinkie at em” i thought knowing my fair share of rom-coms

“I know…i’m just worried about him. What happens when the others find out about what he can do? What if he gets himself killed?”

“lena we arent his parents. Just his friends. But i won’t let it happen. Cage won’t let it. He fared just fine against the giant after all.” Ryan assured.

A sudden crack of the floorboards sent my mind reeling. I raced back to my bed, my heart pounding like thunder.

Luckily, they didn’t seem to notice. Or if they did, they didn’t say anything about it.

I woke up again at roughly 9 AM and walked into the kitchen to find Ryan and lena having breakfast.

        “How can you even say that! Doughnuts are the epitome of pastry evolution!” Ryan exclaimed boldly, as if he was a history professor engulfed in a huge debate.

       “Yeah yeah, i’d love to see you try and stop me from eating a biscuit-” Lena retorted with a mildly playfull sneer.

A stranger sat in the corner, silently eating a pancake. Her movements where calculated, precise. Perhaps even deadly if the situation wasnt breakfast.

       “Who’s that?” I asked

“Oh that’s my sister Ilene.” lena answered.

“Ilane?”

“Ilene. I-LEE-NUH.” Ilene said emphasizing each syllable as if i were a child.

It seemed an odd name to me but i accepted it nonetheless. She brushed her blonde hair behind her denim jacket leaving every guy there thinking to himself “wow…she is so full of herself.”

“I’m here to teach you how to fight.” She said with a hand resting on the hilt of her sword, a sword I hadn’t noticed before. 

You know, as much as I liked her I already hated her and wanted no part of it.

“I can fight just fine thank you.”

“Cage, Ilene is a Grey sparrow.” Ryan said with admiration.

“Duh fudge you just said?”

“she bares the Grey Sparrows mark, the symbol of a master swordsman.”

Ilene on que pulled down her sleeve to reveal a sparrow feather tattooed on her right arm.        

“Or swordswoman, erm, swords-girl- SWORDS-LADY” Ryan said stammering as he gawked at the tattoo as if it were a Ferrari.

lena scowled at noone in particular.

“Swords-lady” I wheezed trying not to start dying of laughter. Ryan was floundering to talk normally to this girl and it both worried and entertained me. Mostly the latter.

Ryan glared at me.

“Yes. And a master one.” she interrupted with complete tolerance and even welcoming of Ryans “sword-*insert gender*” names.

lena, having a change of heart mumbled. “I mean…she’s not THAT good…”

Fast as a hawk Ilene drew her sword and suddenly had a lenas biscuit balanced at the end of her blade. Before I had time to respond, her sword became a blur of strikes and the biscuit dropped in front of me; carved to look just like a sparrow.

She resheathed her sword with a grin and Ryan’s mouth hung open. 

“learned that trick when i was 12,” Ilene beamed.

“How old are you again?” I asked?

“16” she said and Ryan gasped with admiration.

“Holy hell, your amazing!”

lena suddenly scowled and gave up on her biscuit. Everybody else was too busy to take notice of lena silently storming out.

Could lena be…jealous?

I decided to butt in. 

“Yeah, Ryan here is 18! Thats a full 2 years older than you are Ilene! lena is 18 also! What a coincidence.”

I know it wasn’t very casual… but i wanted to help. Wich i think i had because Ryan suddenly had a look on his face as if he’d been woken up by someone dumping a bucket of water on his head.

He sighed “yes…i suppose…” he looked down and cleared his throat, perhaps realizing what this whole thing porbably looked like to his quote “not my girlfriend” lena.

“I suppose you and cage ought to begin training as soon as possible. Besides, I should probably go check on…” he trailed off.

“Check on what?” Ilene asked.

“TURKEY! I left my oven in the turkey- i mean a turkey in the oven!” Ryan said leaving in the same direction as lena had.

“…very well…” Ilene mumbled. Her hand casually moved to rest on her sword again. Always ready, always calm.

“Where shall we begin?”

The question genuinely scared me. She was quick at everything she did, waiting calm and peacefully before breaking it in sudden bursts of action. Her speach was no exception. Nor would her training be…

We practiced in lena’s backyard. Her yard was very stark and dry, sort of the physical incarnation of a a drunk hillbilly. I hadn’t noticed at first but Ilene seemed… I don’t know… like she came from medieval times. Like how she uses the words “thou” and “thee” instead of “you” or how she said “bloody” instead of…well, every other word we have for that now.

“Thou art very bad at this!” she laughed as I barely blocked another strike of her sword.

“You know, most people just use the word ‘you’,” I said casually. Our swords clanged one last time before she disarmed me entirely, my sword flung 10 feet away from my grasp.

“Well, I’m not like most people.” she said her sword pointed to my chest.

“That IS true…” I looked up from the blade and tried to meet her eyes. “how did I do?”

She sat on a nearby tree stump. Which i was glad, I was exhausted from the training and I welcomed the break wholeheartedly. It also helps not to have a sword pointed as your vital organs.

“You make it hard to go easy.” She said sharpening her already razor sharp sword.

“can’t carve a biscuit yet can i?”

“You will get there.”

“i hope. I bet it’s every swordsmans dream to murder a pastery like that.”

She cracked a tiny smile.

“What did Ryan teach you?”

“that doughnuts are the epitome of pastry evolution.” I said with a wry yet friendly smile.

“About swords.” she said with a patience of steel against my sarcastic comments.

“he said it’s all about the mind.”

“Cage, I want you to take all that millions of years of technique and knowledge of fencing…”

“Yeah?”

“And just throw that away.”

“What?”

She sighed.

” it be not about thine mind. It’s about thy heart. Your mind comes into play later but…”

“Seriously, are you omish or something?” She ignored me.

“just bloody-…don’t forget why you fight. Ok cage? The first thing i was taught in the Grey Sparrows was to put my heart into my blade. Once you are dedicated, practice becomes easy. It becomes a desire in your soul to achieve greater things.”

I nodded solemnly, and remained silent until my mind was resolved.

“I want to learn.” I said meeting her gaze.

She smiled genuinely as she gazed into my eyes. The way that Lena did, like she could see something that I could not. I wasnt sure what it was these people saw in me. What my dad saw in me for that matter…

“Thou art loquacious in your ways, but your determination is admirable. You’ll make a formidable swordsman indeed.”

I had no idea what the heckity heck she had just said But ok.

“I don’t speak spanish Ilene.  El No el spanisho

She smirked and resheathed her sword as smoothly as the wind.

“I suppose you will just have to to teach me thine way of speech. Just as i will have to teach you to wield your weapon.”

“Sounds like a deal.” 

And so our training was over for the day.

Cage Cabell part 5 (aka scribble but its more like a chapter thing and other names like that)

We returned to lena’s place where I slept on an old fold out bed. It wasn’t much, but it was enough. I let the thin sheets wrap around me a comfort that I hadnt felt in what felt like years. eventually drifted off into sleep.

I had never dreamt in my life. None of my family had. Not that i knew of, if they did, they never talked about it other than to complain they didnt dream.

In my dream I sat watching a king who surrounded himself with caterpillars.

“Go fetch me a biscuit!” The king commanded.

“Yes, yes! Right away ma’am- SIR! right away sir.” An extra fancy looking caterpillar stammered before scurrying off to fulfill its orders.

After a moment the caterpillar returned holding a doughnut.

“A biscuit for my king!” The caterpillar declared proudly.

The kind just scowled. Apparently he was not amazed at doughnut-gifting talking caterpillars.

“This, is a donut.” the king said, his rage hidden beneath a thin sheet of calm in his voice.

“Yes my lord. Just as u said. ‘BrInG mE a DoGs NuT!’ you said.”

The king boiled with anger.

“I said to bring me a biscuit.”

“Oh.” The caterpillar just sat there smiling.

“NOW GO FETCH ME A BISCUIT!!!”

the caterpillar hurriedly scrambled to retrieve a biscuit.

He came running back with a grin.

“My king i told you i would not disappoint!” the caterpillar said holding up a plate of KFC chicken.

Chris Hemsworth It News and Stuff

Chris HemsWORTH IT!

(sorry for all my faces and headlines but i didnt like that it was showing all the images i had in the post as the featured image so this will block that out just scroll past it)

Chris HemsWORTH IT!This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-4.pngThis image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-4.pngThis image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-4.pngThis image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-4.pngThis image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-4.pngThis image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is image-4.png

hello welcome to Chris Hemsworth It News and Stuff. here is Chris Hemsworth it and co-anchor Chris Hemsworth it

Chris hemsworth it: welcome to Chris Hemsworth it news and stuff. lets start this off with a commercial that hooks you in entirely to an idiotic yet strangely attention grabbing headline.

“do you know what your fingernails are made out of? here at Chris Hemsworth it news and stuff we are uncovering the conspiracy/big deal made out of nothing that doctors may or may not be trying to cover up! and we think the result will literally invoke an emotion from you. here is a tiny out of context snippet from a guy who looks like an expert to further convince you without ever giving any certifiable information but we edited it to sound dangerous.

doctor: if you told me that fingernails are exactly what we thought they were then it would cause me to die of laughter . we really have no real need to hook people into this strange news segment your doing. in fact i really must inform the public that this is FAKE and not to be listened to whatsoever

Chris: welcome back. turns out finger nails are exactly what we thought they were. phew. thanks for tuning in for that potential emergency. now lets move on to the weather, take it away Chris

Chris: hello, so for the forecast we are expecting minor clouds and sun blockage. it should probably be a good week, you can go out with the family- wait, no, sorry there’s a change of plans it is literally raining corona virus now.

but no worries. just stay inside your houses and everything will blow over. back to you chris

Chris: indeed. now lets talk politics, but first lets have a combination of horns and light drums that sound almost exactly the same for every news station to signify our change of topic.

BUM BUMM-BA-BUMM!!!!

Chris: we have news on the monster in the white house, after being accused of being a mutated orange Donald Trump evolved and is now a 15,000 ton monster with flame breath. here’s Chris on the scene.

Chris: hey, so it appears the presidential monster is now attacking the city.

Chris: i did not notice that. thank you for that feedback -genuine smile.- how are the people reacting?

Chris: the people are all very happy because he is actually doing less damage to the country this way.

Chris: i see. considering his sudden transformation is there a possibility of further evolving?

Chris: absolutely not. in fact im so positive that i would bet my first born- never mind he has lazer eyes now.

Chris: wow. good ol Chris. i always admired his ability to stay calm during emergency.

Chris: that’s right Chris.

Chris: wonderful. now lets take a look at the corona outbreak. we have here a man who says he was effected by it everyday for the past 13 years and finally figured out how to get rid of it. he believes he can help stop people from getting it entirely.

“it is easy. just stop buying beer. comprende senor? :D”

Chris: ok…it seems we’ve had a mix up with a Mexican beer company. apologies for the misunderstanding.

“i am still getting paid yes?”
Chris:…..yeah.

Chris: now allow me to turn and look at you all very dramatically while straightening my papers. -dramatic stare-
this has been, Chris hemsworth it news and stuff. good night.

the Feline adorned in headwear (part 3)

And then, with speed that is in similitude with a vulpes. The feline adorned in headwear returned with a cube. It was closed and sealed with a hook.
“Now witness this cozenage!” said the feline. “Steal a visualize!”

And then he obtained vertically upward on the upper roofing with a balance shift of his headwear.

“I name this game rejoicings in a hollow cube.” said the feline.

“In this hollow cube are a singular couple of things i will demonstrate to you at this moment.”

Spoke the feline with a forward balance shift.

“I will lift upward the hook. You will witness a thing improvised. A couple of things. Object singular and object couple. These objects will not clamp their mandibles upon your skin causing harm. They lust to possess rejoicings.” then out of the hollowed out cube emerged object couple and object singular!
And they propelled themselves forward in a speedy fashion over to our combined location in a speedy manner and spoke “how do you do? Would you lust to seizure collections of phalanges with object singular and object couple?” 

And Sally and myself did not have knowledge of what to perform. 

So we were forced to seizure collections of phalanges with object singular and object couple. We seizured their couple collections of phalanges but our Osteichthyes spoke “nay! Nay! Those objects should not be in this domain! Force them to exit! They should not be in this location when your female parental matriarch is not! Place them outside! Place them outside!” spoke the Osteichthyes in the ceramic.

“Possess zero amounts of fuss little Osteichthyes.” Spoke the feline adorned in headwear.

“These objects are morally correct objects.” then he gifted them a fondle.

“They are benign. Oh so benign! They have entered this location to participate in childlike activities. They will gift you a portion of rejoicing on this moist, moist, moist, daytime.”

Then Sally and myself witnessed them propel themselves forward on their legs vertically downward down the antechamber. We saw those couple objects crash their small plastic aircraft on strings on the structural barriers!

Crash! Crash! Crash! Crash! Downward the structural barriers in the antechamber.

Object couple and object singular! They propelled themselves in a speedy fashion upward! They propelled themselves in a speedy fashion downward! On the thread of one small lightweight play thing aircraft we witnessed female parental matriarchs improvised chemise! Her chemise with the circles that are burgundy-ish blank. Blank and crimson. Then we witnessed one small lightweight play thing aircraft on a string crash on the cranium of her bed.

The girl in pink and blue

She had this dress

It was pink and blue

And stripes ran down it’s chest.

She had this hope

That life would greet her.

But life said nope.

Life continued to beat her.

She had this doubt

That was mild in nature but darker in tone.

What was this life all about?

Perhaps something that she’d never known.

She had this master

That took her in it’s fist

And it’s beatings taxed her

Taxed her for love, hope, spirits, and all that sat in her midst.

She had this strife

That told her to end.

But she had this passion

Just over that hill

That told her “fear not, this doubt will pass on”

She will make it.

She had this pink and blue dress

That went rather nicely

With the golden heart that beats in her chest.

And now she tells those with doubts 

“This doubt will pass on, and you, my dear reader, you will make this life your passion.

You will make it. You will make it.”

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